Rare Delicacies

There is a Chinese saying ‘A chinaman will eat any living thing as long as the back faces the sky’. I guess the only animal’s back that doesn’t face the sky would be a dead decaying animal which is laying on its back rotting away. I am very sure it’s true because people really do eat weird things from lizards to creepy stuffs.

Thanks to Seki and Benji’s trip to Cambodia I managed to get my hand on some snacks that I have been dying to try. I think to most civilized modern city slickers like us would not even imagine how wonderful other food are besides the staple beef, chicken, seafood, mutton lamb…etc. WARNING! Read on at your own risk.

Meet Pinocchio's guardian angel Jiminy Cricket! "Stop lying Pinocchio or your dick will grow long" Ohh shuddup already come here you lil irritating bastard!! Munch!!! Munch!!! BURP! Yummy.A stupid gwailo will tell you it taste just like chicken, frankly speaking its damn darn good!! I couldnt stop eating it taste like fried anchovies salty and crunchy. Apparently this is the hottest selling snack in Thailand, Cambodia & Vietnam. GOOD SHITE!! Jiminy gets 5 stars out of 5 no wonder my pet arowana loves it so much. If you do wanna try this out please remove the 2 back legs before putting it into your mouth its hard and prickly.

Asian farmers have learnt to control their crops from devastating locust by frying them in spicy oil. Gwailos should learn this from them as these hoppers are rich in protein. It pretty much taste the same as the cricket except this is 3 times larger and has a harder exoskeleton. $1 rates 3.5 stars for the locust.

Why bother popping Methylenedioxymethamphetamine(MDMA) aka Ecstasies to get high? May I suggest popping these healthier Silkworms, they are so much cheaper I think 1 MDMA pill can set you off from 1-2 jugs of beer which will also get you high! The same amount you pay for a MDMA can also get you 1 year supply of Silkworms. Cant rate this worm cause I dont like it, it's neither tasty or nasty. The texture reminds me of eating soft cooked soy beans. Lets move on to the final creepy crawly.

I specifically ordered this before they left for Cambodia, its the nastiest looking crawler I ever put in my mouth. Watched a Tarantula documentary on Animal Planet and they showed the Amazonian natives eating this and latter use the fangs as toothpicks. Unfortunately this spider's fangs has been removed. I expected they would remove the hairs on the body before frying them, but there were quite alot of hairs all over the legs. Tarantulas are vicious arachnids equipped with venom to dissolve they prey into soup for sucking and hairs that are highly sharp to avoid predators. They flick their body hairs into the air towards their predator's nostrils & eyes causing severe pain and irritation. Yet the mighty tarantula ended up in my tummy. BURP!!! Despite the nasty looks its actually not too bad. If can eat soft shell crabs, you can eat tarantulas. The texture is the same slightly crunchy and chewy, all these crawlers taste the same as they're fried in the same spicy oil. Would rate this a 4 star out of 5.

I didnt pose for the camera with those incests hanging in my mouth for the sake of this blog, I ATE all of it. I'm bitch but I aint a pussy. Conclusion, be adventurous with food cause you only live once. My motto is "Eat now, worry later". Ciao!

Medical Certs ROCKS!!!

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Stabbed in the back!

My yearly muscular problem has struck me again it was roughly the same time last year when I was just rolling on my bed and I felt a pull on my back and tore a muscle. It happens to me a lot for the pass few years. I believe the problematic muscle that keeps on haunting me is my Erector Spinae – Spinalis, this muscle is located by the spine connecting to the laterals and shoulder plate.
This year I was working on my planted tank and I got too tired of sitting and squatting, so I took 2 beanbags and lay on my chest. Just when I reaching out to my tools I felt the bursting sensation on my upper back, and it instantly immobilized me. I couldn’t move for a few moments till my endocrine glands start producing and releasing Endomorphines(natural morphine for pain killing) which is also known as endorphins to counter act the pain. Beware when endorphins are released into my blood stream, stay away from me because it doesnt only act as a natural pain killer it raises anger like a PMS bitch! have you ever seens a person in pain happy? The pain wasn’t too bad on Sunday night I still manage to get to work on Monday, it started when I was watching Dr.House on my laptop on my bed and rolled over to the side and I felt a very sharp pain on the effected area. That was it!!!! Went into the kitchen to cook up some high protien food hoping it will recover during my sleep, unfortunately it didn’t work I had to call in for MC and went to the clinic to get a referal letter from the GP to see my orthopaedic today.
Enough of the long bitch story, allow me to share my pain with you. I cant recall how many times this happened to me but tere were quite a number of embarassing moments couple of years back. Once happened in my old office I was just helping some guys to carry some stuff and my muscle ripped! SMACK!!! I was laying on the floor faced down and my office mates back tought I fainted or something. Then there was this one time I was just tossing a child from my arms up into the air and RIPPED!!!! This time I couldn’t go down cause I had to catch the kid first then pin down by the pain. The pain is so excruciating that you can see tears rolling down my cheeks. Imagine this, taking deep breath hurts, coughing hurts, cant wash my hair, and slight sudden movement to my back hurts, walking…..etc the list just goes on. The effected muscle is also connected to the rib cage that explains the pain breathing. I’m off to the hospital for my check up and physio therapy, they better gimme a hot sweet looking nurse last year wasn’t too bad she was quite sweet and soft spoken.

Bow to the lil' Saint

Just came back from an excruciating drinking session with my office mates and got a mail notification from my Messenger. Felt a little horny, so I decided to check my mails hoping its some adult rated mails I usually get from my mates, to my surprise the first mail was tittled Dylan Yeap. DAMN!!!! Congratulations dSaint and Di!! Proud parent of lil Dylan aka Lil Saint weighing at 2.71Kg. He look like a cute lil saint and so adorable!! No wonder he doesn’t blog and log on messenger anymore. I suspected he was on ‘DADDY’ leave but I wasn’t to sure. Such a BITCH!!!!!! Anyway will go visit them next week with some cigars.

It has been 2 years.....

Ever had a buddy whom is closer to you than you own brothers? Someone who never fails to back you up in anyway when you feet lands in shit? The very same person whom would take a stab or a bullet for you.

I knew Edmund since we were in high school, only clicked when we were in college. Let’s just say we’re pretty much like brothers for 9 long years. Where ever you are Ed, I bet life is much better on the other side. It has been 2 years…… life is so different without you around we still miss you a lot. Not in the mood to write on this, rest in peace my brother.